Test for a Marriage? Give Hanging Curtains Together a Try

Experts say that arguing about money puts a strain on a marriage, but may I suggest that if you want to test the true strength of your marriage, hang curtain rods together.

Invariably there will be discussions about how to measure, from the ceiling? From the casing? From the rod itself? And when are 84 inch drapes not truly 84 inch drapes? These are just a few of the inconsequential questions that arise, and nine times out of ten, each member of the marriage has a different answer for each of these questions.

Sunday was curtain/drape hanging day in my house. Actually, the 1st hanging day was 2 days previously, but the result was....(1) the brackets weren't exactly level, so the rod dipped ridiculously to the left by about an inch and a half, and (2) the 84 inch curtains, although meticulously measured 84 inches from the rod, dragged on the floor by about 2 inches.

I am not the best at measuring, do not claim to be a whiz with an electric drill either, but I can tell when something is being hung crookedly. Problem is, when mentioning this to the other member of this marriage, I get the look. Everyone understands that look. The one that says, "I know what I am doing. I am hanging your friggin curtains, the last thing I ever wanted to do on a Sunday, so back off lady!" Yeah, that look.

So we hang the curtains. Once again, Crooked! Back to the drawing board. I casually suggest that perhaps we could maybe just raise the brackets 2 inches from the previous holes, and perhaps use a level to make sure the bracket on the left was even with the one in the middle and the one on the left. Again with the look.

About an hour and half after we began the curtain ordeal, we are finished. The rod looks straight enough, and the curtains no longer drag on the floor by 2 inches. If you look really closely you may notice that the drapes on the left are about a half inch closer to the floor than the ones on the right, my explanation is that the entire house lists to the right by one half inch. There is no way I am going to point this out and risk getting that look again.

And I am also refraining from asking the question, "When do you think the 12 extra drill holes (which appear very white against my newly painted Williamsburg Blue wall) will be spackled and re-painted, dear?" Do not want to press my luck with getting the look.

Can't wait for the day we hang a mirror in the newly painted living room.....I can almost guarantee the look will be making a repeat performance.